You never expected that ending your marriage would be easy, but your spouse’s reaction was worse than you ever dreamed possible. You’d rather not even speak to them right now, let alone try to negotiate your split.

Should you just let the court make all the rulings in your divorce? Probably not.

Why is a contested divorce problematic?

When a couple can’t agree on the terms of their split, the divorce is called “contested.” In general, contested divorces are:

Roughly 95% of divorces eventually proceed through the court as “uncontested,” no matter how acrimonious they started. There are times, of course, when an uncontested divorce is the only way to go — particularly when a spouse is completely unreasonable, determined to be punitive or is outright dangerous. Unless those situations apply, however, you may want to sit your spouse down and try to get them to understand the advantages of working together as you pull apart.